Spring Break

Again, I am behind...we have been home from Spring Break now for almost 2 weeks! It was a very different spring break for us this year as we left the "golf town"-all 7 of us- as a family! It was nice, a bit sad for what is past, but a new "new" and it was nice.

Exploring downtown Jacksonville

Miss Smiley

It is sooooo hard to get all 5 to look, smile and hold still!

runners

Enjoying the early evening on the beach

The traditional Dairy Queen run

Sunset out our window!

Do we have tans yet.......?

The little mermaid

The sand castle team

Xin ALWAYS closes his eyes!!!!!!

A last gaze at the surf before we return home.

Milkshakes

"Beautiful".....and Lulu is 3!!!

When we were waiting for Lulu we heard the song "Beautiful" by Mercy Me and knew it had to be "her song" so we put it on her adoption website. As we celebrated our beautiful girl turning 3 yesterday I couldn't help but hear these words and think of her story...where she came from and how far she has come in just a little over a year! 

Here are the words to that amazing song:

Days will come when you don't have the strengthAnd all you hear is you're not worth anythingWondering if you ever could be lovedAnd if they truly saw your heart they'd see too much
You're beautifulYou're beautifulYou are made for so much more than all of thisYou're beautifulYou're beautifulYou are treasured, You are sacred, You are HisYou're beautiful
Praying that you'd have the heart to fight'Cause you are more than what is hurting you tonightFor all the lies you've held inside so longThey are nothing in the shadow of the cross
You're beautifulYou're beautifulYou are made for so much more than all of thisYou're beautifulYou're beautifulYou are treasured, You are sacred, You are His[ From: http://www.metrolyrics.com/beautiful-lyrics-mercy-me.html ]You're beautiful

Before you ever took a breathLong before the world beganOf all the wonders He possessedThere was one more preciousOf all the earth and skies aboveYou're the one He madly lovesEnough to die
You're beautifulYou're beautifulIn His eyes
You're beautifulYou were meant for so much more than all of thisYou're beautifulYou are treasured, You are sacred, You are HisYou're beautifulYou're beautifulYou're meant for so much more than all of thisYou're beautifulYou're beautifulYou are treasured, You are sacred, You are His
Here is the celebration in pictures!

Look at that smile! It radiates beauty! And joy! And love! And worth!

At 3, Lulu is still very tiny and looks more like an 18 month-2 yr old. She is still very much a baby in some ways and then in others well beyond her 3 yrs! Very precocious! She is a dare devil and tries anything her siblings are doing! She loves anything princess, Barbie, babies, playing house, playing outside, pretending, playing in the bathtub and playing with Jaida and Xin-the 3 are best of buddies! She loves her big brother and sister fiercely. She will run to me with arms up for her "Mama fix" and rest her head on my right shoulder with thumb in mouth. She eats well and is actually a bit chubby now! So cute to see some"fat" on that little body. She is smart and funny and confident. She still struggles a little with strength in her lower body and we work that little left leg hard to build it up! I guess if you have enough kids eventually you get the "issues" you thought "Really, kids do that?" Lulu is that one.....playdough up the nose,weird objects in her mouth, climbing on anything, hiding in the clothes racks from me at stores, writing in and on things that shouldn't be written on,etc! Maybe it is the fact that at number 5 I am not right by her side watching for "those things" as I was for numbers 1 and 2????? She has come such a LONG way and we are just so in love with this daughter/sister of ours! We are blessed by her immeasurably! Happy 3rd Birthday Lulu! We love you so very much!!!!!

3 years!

April 14th marked 3 years that Xin has been with us, his forever family! He has come so far in those 3 years! He was just 4 when he walked out of one life and into another with nothing but the clothes on his back! Can you imagine? 3 years seems like so long ago yet he still, even 3 years with us, lived longer in the orphanage. He is a kind little fella with a sharing heart. He does so well in school. He is happy and he loves life. At 7 he still seems young, more like a 4 year old really. But there is great progress! We love you Xin and are so glad God made you our son/brother! Happy Forever Family Day #3 Xin!

We celebrated a day early as the 14th was a travel day home.We were at the beach and had donuts in the morning, beach time in the afternoon and dinner out to cap off the night!

He got a little dinosaur egg as a gift.

He worked hard to excavate the dinosaur inside...he had no idea he was covered in dust from the egg!

Catching up...wow, get it together Amy!

So..... I am so far behind I am going to do several random "happenings" into one big post! We have rented out our house this year for the Master's tournament, what most people do in this city this time of year, and so I have been readying for that. OH MY! Pandora's Box! But now I will have a CLEAN, VERY CLEAN house when we return with fresh flowers planted and ready for spring and summer! Here goes.........

EASTER and NANA'S BIRTHDAY

Decorating eggs

Celebrating Nana...with just 1 cousin this time :(

My Mom always sets the prettiest tables with lots of natural and interesting elements!

An Easter bonnet on an Easter cutie!

VISIT from SPECIAL FRIENDS!

So glad the Wilson's made the trek from Michigan during spring break to visit us! We traveled with this family in 2007 to get Jaida. Nicole and Jaida are Ning Du buddies- they were in the same orphanage. These kids have grown SO MUCH! Such a fun afternoon!!!!!

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Look at those cuties!

And the "Bigs", who picked up right where they left off!

 Such sweet relationships have been made on all of our journeys to China, a blessing we never could have anticipated!

JAIDA and the BASEBALL GAME

Jaida won a ticket to the Green Jackets baseball game by reading the required amount of books. So proud of this little love! She is an amazing reader...and only in Kindergarten! She and Daddy had a special night at the ballpark which included a parade on the field of all the winners, ball park concessions, and time spent with her #1 man! Way to go Jaida!!!!

AND SOME CUTENESS!

What you can't really see in this bad photo is the amount of accessories this little spitfire has on...rings on those cute little "nubbins" bracelets or ponytail holders posing as bracelets, necklaces, beads, and a ribbon purposefully placed and draped around her neck, Elton John-like glasses, and Dora earrings! Oh she cracks me up!

Here she is sporting the same Princess dress as above as we must ALWAYS have on a Princess dress these days, high heels-also a necessity, and a Happy Birthday crown. She was dancing like princesses do! Oh the joy of a lager-than-life 2 year old! Never a dull moment!!!!! :)

Ok, so now I think I have caught up! Off to clean some more. For those of you in the south, you know the lovely yellow pollen that befalls upon us this time of year and coats EVERYTHING outside in that golden/green dust....must go tackle that today....but first I will swallow and allergy pill!

HAPPY SPRING!

The Eagles

Ok so I am behind on my posting..... two weeks ago my sweet big girl went to Missouri with the Eagles basketball team, boys and girls. They made the 14 hour drive to the National Homeschool Basketball Tournament in Springfield MO for 6 days of fun. Oh how I wish I could have been there! Two of the girls' moms drove them in a 15 passenger van and became surrogate moms for the 6 days they were gone. Bless their sweet hearts! These girls are such an awesome group of girls and emotions were running hi...and low....over the days. Between winning, losing, saying goodbye to a teammate, and ending an amazing season, snowball fights and sled riding down hills on pizza boxes, yes they had a snow storm, and the camaraderie of the teams..... these brave moms cheered on the happiest of moments and soothed with hugs and pep talks on the low, teary moments for these teenaged vessels FILLED with emotions.

The girls ended the season with  4th place in the highest division, not too shabby for a 1st time appearance at the National tournament. The poor boys did not fair so well....but they had a good time!

Julia played extremely well and earned a spot on the All-American team! I REALLY hated not being there and cheering this first born of mine on. I did receive pictures and videos each game from the precious moms that did go! So proud of Julia! She plays with such heart and emotion, a trait I know will carry her far into life once her sporting days are over.

Beautiful girls inside and out!

Team huddle before game

Praying before a game

Returning home

A tired bunch of girls

  But still a silly bunch of girls!!!!

The kids wanted to welcome her home with signs on the doors

My All-American! I love you Julia and am so proud of you....and SO glad you are back! We all missed her soooo very much!

A Few Less Accessories

So we are sporting a few less accessories in our house this week....and that's a good thing!

After a year and a half of braces and a huge wad of metal on the roof of his mouth to fix a cross bite.......

Sam has BEAUTIFUL straight teeth! Oh my they look soooooo good! He came straight home and took a huge bite out of an apple! Ha!

And little Miss Lulu.....

This HUGE club of a cast (note cute little thumb peaking out on right side).....

Is now just a souvenir !

And beautiful new fingers have emerged! 

Ok, maybe the fingers aren't as beautiful as the teeth... with the stitches still partially in and the swelling and redness surrounding those little appendages but they work and they wiggle and they look a whole lot better!

Praising God for LESS this week!

In the Silence

It has been almost a year since we first learned that Will's position at work would be eliminated. It has been 6 months since his last day of work. It has been a very difficult year. Will and I have been through hard before...both individually before we met and together. We felt God's presence at those times and that is what got us through those previous trials. This is different. God seems absent. He is silent. Now, we know through His numerous promises in the Bible that this is not true...He is always with us. But we can't feel him. We can't hear Him. And that makes it really HARD. For me, I have searched the scriptures, I have prayed, pleaded, cried out to Him, confessed, just plain cried. Nothing. Silence. It is deafening. I need Him. I need to hear Him. I want to hear Him. I want this all to be done. But it isn't and I/we have to be ok with that. You see, we have prayed throughout this whole thing to be in HIS will. That is where we want to be. Well, if He isn't guiding us somewhere else, then right here in "nothingness" is where He must want us for now. Oh the uncertainty! The what if's. The fears that creep in. Why can't I just TRUST Him...completely?

But in this silence I am learning things. Much about myself. Not always pretty. I have been taken down low and made to examine my heart and I haven't liked what I have seen at all times. I have reached the point, awhile ago, where I didn't think I could get any lower. But isn't that where He wants us so that we are looking up to Him for our dependency? We are to find sufficiency in Him...Him alone. Not what He can do for us...just Him. Wow, that is HARD. Shouldn't be but it is, at least for me it is. YUK!

I hate money. I wish we were on the barter system. You know, I'll give you some eggs since I have chickens if you give me some milk since you have a cow kind of thing. But....I have discovered through this that I placed a lot of value on money and I was/am very dependent on it. I guess we all are as we live in the world and do need it to survive, but the place it held in my heart was/ is more than it should be. YUK!

I have also struggled with this... "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him who have been called according to His purposes." Romans 8:28 and other similar verses. But the thing that scares me, terrifies me, and that I can't wrap my brain around or don't want to is this....it doesn't all seem to work out all the time....at least not in this life. Eternity, but not here. A family of believers loses their child to an accident or sickness....doesn't work out in this life to get their child back. They have to trust this tragedy is for the greater good. They have to live this life here on earth with deep pain....BUT....knowing in eternity there will be no more tears. WOW! Now, I am not equating our situation to that by any means. But I know very specific incidences where things have NOT worked out here in this life. And so the fear creeps in....what if this doesn't end well? What if there is more to come? So I studied Job. WOW! The trust he had in His God, my God. The faith. Where is my faith? Again, YUK!

Letting God have total and I mean TOTAL control, not the "Well, I will just hold on lightly to this God cause I do know what is best for me/us." kind of control. That is HARD for me. Now, you would think with 3 adoptions I would have learned this lesson as it is hard to control 2 different governments and all the "stuff" that is involved with adopting....ha! Nope. Still learning. Again, He took me down low and the burden became so heavy I could NOT carry it anymore. Just last weekend at an adoption conference I laid it down, gave it to Him....or at least it feels lighter now. Please Lord don't let me grab for it back! I don't want it. I WANT you to have it....but oh wait...that would mean I would have to TRUST you with it. Back to that again!

We have not only been hit with a job loss but also with several other "things" throughout this time of unemployment. Hard things. Deep things. The emotions that sometimes seem too much to feel from not only myself but my husband and my kids make it even harder. We are learning what is really important and what is not. And we have learned who our true friends are and those that really don't want to deal with the hard stuff. That is a loss too we have had to bear. I hope this makes me a better friend. A deeper, stick with ya through the hard stuff kind of friend. I hope this makes me "see" peoples' pain and fears and allows me to empathize more. Isn't that what Christ wants us to do? How many times have I been "too busy" to notice someone's pain? Forgive me Lord. YUK!

So in the silence there has been much learning and growing. I am not at the point yet where I can say "That time was worth all the pain and struggles we went through to get to here." I hope that comes....soon. It has been a long year. LONG. And overwhelming. I want to be finished. But we aren't yet and we don't know when we will be. He knows. And that has to be ok. Remember that old "story"-Footprints- of the person who was walking through trials and he wondered where God was...there was only one set of footprints? God replies something like this "In those trials my dear child, you see only one set of footprints because I was caring you." Oh carry me Lord and don't let me go..........in the silence.